Diets a lifetime relationship that I no longer befriend, to do's and do dones.

I think the word diet has been in my vocabulary for the whole of my life time.  I remember my momma being on the cottage cheese diet before I knew what a diet or cottage cheese were for that matter.  My momma and my Grand-momma Gladys were on every diet you can imagine in my memory. The grapefruit, the saccharin, the cabbage, the whatever and then there were the pills, the chew tablets and the whatevers that the diet company's put out at the time and in hindsight I know that they still had amphetamines in them back then.  My momma went from diets to loving you with food and back again, come to think of it my Grand-momma and my great-grandma supplemented their love with food on the table and snacks in between so no wonder I am in a love hate relationship with dieting at my age.   I myself spent a good many years trying diet but since I rarely as an adult had the money, or maybe didn't want to short my families food budget, seldom had the money to buy the things on the diets that I would have had to have to do them exactly right.  I have done my versions of atkins, alli, and may others, I never did the low fat, or vegetarian ones, after all there are some thing I never would have given up any way.  I have read almost every diet book ever printed, and for those of you who know me reading a book in a few short hours or maybe 1/2 hours is nothing so I have read more than most anybody would ever want to.  I decided about 4 or 5 years ago I am never "dieting" again.  I have lost 100 lbs and gained it all back more that once, and maybe as many as three times, and I know big yo-yoing is more dangerous than just being fat.  Yes, I said it I am fat.  I know that.  Years ago my doctor told me that, well he actually told most of his patients that, but I wanted to say to him "and you don't think I know that, I have a mirror".  So for those of you who think I missed that I am fat it is not news to me and has never been.  I however have learned a lot from years of experience and years of studying the situation.  I have not lost weight in years but I have learned how to cook right, just look at my lovely ladies, 15% body fat, someone is doing something right for them, and I am the one in charge of their diet.  I know how to eat right. We have in the last 5 years given up most of the evils in the modern diet.  I just got my new driver's license and was amazed that though I am the same size as I was 8 years ago, I am not ruddy and puffy, my photos looks a lot healthier.  I also know I need more exercise or I need to change the right food to a right amount for me considering I can't get the exercise I really need, not just the three I take care of.

I have many friend who have lived a similar co-dependent life with dieting and food as I have.  All of us meet this challenge in a way that makes sense to each of us.  Some of my friends are juicing, some are on new diets, and all sorts of different thought processes toward overcoming their own personal battles.  I wish them all the best of luck with their personal demons because in the end we all have to battle in our own ways.  I have come to the determination that I can only battle the demon on my own so far.  I have to live a lifestyle not a diet, yes eating a diet is a part of a lifestyle but being on a diet is not a lifestyle.  I have decided, and did long ago decide not to diet again, but I have decide to life my lifestyle diet with in the confines of my lifestyle.  I have to live it with in the confines of what I actually can afford to eat the rest of my life, I have to eat in a manner that is something I can maintain for a lifetime, I have to live and eat with in my lifestyle.  I have spent the greater part of the last year canning food.  Did you know that you can't can fat in any great way, and for the most part I can can healthy foods.  I get to decide what I put in the can, no extra salts, no extra sugars, not chemicals and msg's to make people eat more than they need to.  I have become a BBFC addict and they are soon to offer meats, yay.

I know the right things to do, I know I have to exercise more but with a baby most of the time it has been difficult, but I can do more with the time and space I have.  I recently figured out that dieting was a demon, I have tried and tried on my own to do it and have always failed in the end.  I finally realized recently that I can take it to the Lord and asked that he have the Holy Spirit help me.  I know I am probably not supposed to ask the Lord to do for my what I can do for myself but in the end I have realized that I can not after 30 plus years of trying actually do it on my own.  I have asked that the Lord help me and if he can have the Holy Spirit help me have the discipline and strength to live a lifestyle that will actually get me to the age of 94, which I really believe is the age he has given me to live on this earth, I don't actually know why but for some reason I believe it.  I want to be of service to him, my family and friends for the time he gives me here on earth and with his help I can succeed and be the person he wants me to be.  I have been doing really good on my lifestyle changes since I asked the Lord for help, down more than 10 pounds already.

I pray that all my friend accomplish their dieting success, I pray that the Lord has a hand in their changes and they succeed in their lives.  I do know that I can not do it alone and for me the Lord is the answer.  I think he should be everyone's answer as well.  I hope you start by asking him for your salvation for that is where all relationships with God begin....tomorrow.