Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Off to the ortho, again, painting progression, mantle up.... knitting lessons.

Yogie was chewing on meat this weekend and part of her braces came off, so we are off to the Zoo to have it put back on this morning.  We are going to make a quick trip in, make a couple stops and back home.  I have to go to CAKLs today for sure.  Our little Birdie is wanting to make a frilly yarn scarf.  She had brought her yarn and needles last week for me to teach her how.  I had bought yarn to make the girls each one but hadn't begun them so didn't know actually how.  She gave me the pattern so I could show her.  I asked her if she could knit, No.  I tried to read the overly simple pattern and in the hub bub I was a loss at where to begin.  She said the class cost 45 dollars.  I told her I would figure out how to make them and show her at CAKLs this week.  I did come home from CAKLs last week and Youtubed to see how to make them, her pattern was not so good.  I surfed the tube and what do you know the person charging 45 dollars to teach you how to do this is a thief.  It is so simple it wouldn't take 5 minutes to teach.  I am thinking even teaching her how to knit, the cost of the needles and the yarn wouldn't still justify that cost.  So I have to be back to be at CAKLs for our little Birdie. 

I am making progress on the painting.  I got 3 of the 7 doors painted.  The Moroccan orange is definitely a statement, I am sort of glad I didn't choose one of the darker oranges I thought about.  When I first painted it was shocking, maybe more so due to the blue tape adjacent to the orange paint.  Once the blue tape was taken down it really has begun to grow on me.  I think the three colors do go well together sort of a southwestern feel. I do love the southwest style, sort of a tribute to our forays to New Mexico and Arizona in my childhood, and so love adobe.  I ended up with the really good beige paint from my mom, lovely creamy yellow and the Moroccan orange that I chose not quite as good of paint but as good as I could get here in town.  Poppie got the mantle and the antique columns up. Our great room which is composed of  the kitchen and the front room is coming together still so finish painting to do but we are making great progress.  I think the thing I like best about it is that it has an overall warm feeling about it. 

I have to get going to the Zoo so I will say good bye for now.  I leave you in the Lords arms hoping you have opened your Bible to read and hear his word for yourself, my soul wishes you the comfort of God in your soul..... tomorrow.

Monday, April 29, 2013

Bubbles goes the way of Bug.......

Sadly over the years you hear about small children that get way from their parents supervision in rural areas and drown.  It is always a horrible loss and the loss unimaginable.  It is not new and it probably will always happen and has for millennium.  I personally know of a family that this has happened to in two different generations.  The family is not abnormal, they love their children, as we all do, and both were pure accidents that caused unaccountable sorrow and pain.  This last year in Montana I can recall at least two occasions were toddlers wondered away and drown in ponds near their homes.  People hear of these sad losses and say "How does that happen? Where were the parents? There must be neglect. This doesn't happen if you are taking care of your child.  Why does this happen at all?"  I am here to tell you that in rural Montana, probably other places as well but I have no personal knowledge of other places, it does happen to loving careful caring families.  These incidents are not crimes, they are not acts of negligent parents, these are parents that like other parents lost a child in the country for a moment in time and just didn't get as lucky as their neighbor.  Have you ever spent time with a toddler in the country, on a farm, camping or just playing in their yard?  I have an I am one of the ones that got lucky, more than once.

My first incidents of Gods grace, and of his holding my child in his arms in a case like this, was in the fall of 1984.  I had just had Mokie, she was 11 days old, it was late October, Bug was 22 months old he wanted to go out and play in the yard.  I was at my mom's, which was next door to our house, I let him go out with his little sled and his dog Buddy, a Doxie.  I could see them from the big picture window in the front room.  They played and ran around the yard, Bug threw snow balls at the snowman in the yard where the green grass peaked through the early snow.  The baby cried so I breast feed her and changed her diaper, which took about 10 minutes time.  I looked out the window to check on Bug, his dog and his snow play.  He was gone.  I gave the baby to my mom and went out to check on him.  He was not in the yard anywhere and it was a very large yard, albeit not fenced all around.  I called him and called him, no answer.  I then heard a crying sound.  I looked over the bank of the property, 20 feet down was an old road that was no longer used and 30 feet below that was another bank, across the flat about 60 feet or so where the bank drops down about 100 feet stood my 22 month old.  He was crying not because he was cold or worried where momma was, really, but because he was standing on a patch of ice at the edge of a cliff in his eyes.  His feet were on the ice and if he moved them they slid and he could see that the bank drop was where he would go if he slid.  I went crazy, I ran down the first bank, and fell, I caught my pants on a stick in the bank.  My mom came to the edge of the yard, with the baby and asked if I found Bug.  I said "yes but I fell and caught my pants on a stick."  Well I tried to get my pants off of the stick and there was much more than the pants caught on the stick.  I told her I caught my leg on the stick.  I pulled it off ran across the road down the bank across the flat and grabbed my son.  He hugged me and pointed at the bank, as if to say "see what could have happened."  I took him up the bank and went to the DR, I got 30 stitches in my leg, funny it never hurt, well until about 2 years later when all of a sudden the nerves seemed to come to life one day, reminded me of the incident all over again.  I was not a negligent parent, I just turned away for a moment in time and he was gone.  The cliff like bank or the creek at the bottom of it were both possible deaths for my son but unapparent dangers we had never really though of.  Did any of the parents that lost a child in a subdivision think that that pond a quarter mile down the road was in their child realm? NO.

Bubbles spent the day playing with her siblings and cousins on Saturday.  She came and got hugs from Nannie and Poppie over the garden fence.  She played in the goat pen, chased the duck, the goose and squeezed the cat that didn't want her love in the yard.  She giggled at the piglets as all the kids played around her.  The rode their bikes up and down the driveway.  Caught newts in the pond, played in the tree house that doesn't have a tree.  Poppie and Nannie worked in the garden, Son built on his boar pen, and Mokie was making dinner.  Soon Mokie came out to call the kids in to dinner.  No Bubbles.  She wasn't in the goat pen, she wasn't chasing duck and geese, or pestering kitties, she wasn't catching newts or hanging from the playhouse steps.  She was gone.  Mokie checked her back yard, no Bubbles, she checked over the bank (Mokie and Son live on the property I did when the kids were little so same banks).  She went across the road and there was our Bubbles climbing merrily up the 30 foot bank, we have no idea if she had gone across the flat to look down the 100 ft bank to view the creek or not.  She was happy as a clam chattered at mom and waved.  She had been on an adventure, must have been channeling Uncle Bug,  heaven forbid.   He never could stay in the yard, shortly after the bank incidents he climbed to the top of a 70 foot bull pine tree.  Poppie had to climb up and get him down.  Lets all pray the Bubbles is not as he was, but I am thinking we are already to late, she has never done anything at anyone's pace but her own.  She walked at nine months, began speaking in sentences, small yes, but sentences none the less.  She is an adventurer with trails to blaze and country to discover, glad it is not me this time, I couldn't raise another Bug, I just don't have the strength.  Say, I am not sure I have the strength to even have to watch Bubbles in the short term....hmmm.

My conclusion is that accidents happen, more times than not good loving careful parent get lucky and once in awhile a tragedy occurs, no one is really to blame and a lifetime of what "if's" can't change the outcome of one moment in time.  I pray that you never have to endure the outcome of a toddlers adventures.  I hope the Lord blesses your day, you life and your eternity with his Grace.... tomorrow.  

Sunday, April 28, 2013

Sleeping with the TV on, Letting kids sleep and Spirituality really does give you a healthier longer life.... who knew?

I awoke to the sounds of my TV, as I do every morning, on the week days it changes to the local morning news show at 5:30 so I can start my morning routine.  I watch the news, the weather and then at 6 we have Bible reading, followed by the girls practicing their singing for their ministering at the nursing home or the memorize parables.  They finish us with prayers and then read their 4-H lessons, reference guide, or do homework or read books until 7.   I must take a moment to say how proud of my Littles I am, they sang Blessed Assurance at the nursing home and assisted living home yesterday.  Booboo said that when they said they were going to sing it several ladies were excited because they like that one.  Two of the ladies and one gentleman sang with them, how wonderful.  I think that one of the nicest gifts you can give to the aged has nothing to do with present that money can buy, it has to do with spending time with them, and when a child spends time with them it is especially special for them.  My girls love going and work hard practicing their songs,  they may not always sing on key but the love they take to the aged people is a blessing. 

I say again I awoke to the sound of the TV, funny a short time later the news said that a new study says that people who sleep with the TV on increase their memory.  I am so worried that because I am so like my dad, in my memory patterns, that some day I will continue to be like him and loose it so anything that may help me keep mine or length mine is great.  Who knew?  The news went on to say that science says that kids who sleep in to, say 9, have less fog in their brains and learn better.  They also say that with the late rising they need to go to bed early.  I know how silly to think that a kid, especially a teen would go to bed early, but most do like to sleep in until mom kicks them out of bed. Okay, so I am one for one, well maybe two for one, we do put them to bed by 8, actually we all are in our bed rooms by 8, but no late risers here.  Who knew?  The final bit of information I gleaned from the news this morning was that Spirituality lengthens a person life by up to  2-4 years.  How exciting to know, but it is not the going to the building that does the lengthening.  They did go on to say that the act of going to a Church building is not in and of itself what does it, but the living of spirituality with it.  They said it lowers the blood pressure, takes away stress and gives a person a more calming life.  Okay, to me this is like one of those studies where they spent millions of dollars to prove something that say a mom that spends time with a child already knows.  Do any of you out there who go to Church regularly ever doubt that life benefits you derive from going to Church?  Sometimes it can be hard to go every week but the doing of it does bring you closer to God, it does give you a calming in your life that you can get nowhere else.  It would only make since that it would lower your blood pressure, help you to drink one (or more) less drinks at the bar if you even go to the bar.  Who knew? well the faithful among us did. 

Booboo and I made two batches of strawberry jelly yesterday and then 3 batches of granola.  We had a great time together.  Yogie spent time with her little cousins.  Both acts of spending time with some one because you love them.  The Ladies then went, as I said before, to the nursing home and shared in congregational their spirituality.  I am happy to say they have shared in adding to the length of their lives with other people lengthening their lives in the praising of the Lord.  How wonderful it is to have the secular world acknowledge what the people who worship daily already knew.  I hope you spend your morning adding to your life by worshiping the Lord.... tomorrow.

Saturday, April 27, 2013

Garden tilling, Tattler success, and the tattles begin.....

The morning started with a batch of reprocessing to try and seal the 5 jars that didn't seal, well there were actually 7 but 2 were pints and I rarely reprocess pints.  I used the pints to make Poppie soup, two pints of unsealed spaghetti sauce, I quart of canned pork, one chopped giant carrot that the little girls couldn't eat all of, three chopped red potatoes from my BBFC basket, lunch for Poppie.  Poppie actually really liked it, as did both Bubbles and Cubbie, success.  I reprocessed the jars with a 1/4 turn backwards, Prisilla, hadn't comment to my blog at that point so didn't get her advise before I started the batch.  3 of the jars did not seal.  I chopped 25 pounds of carrots as I processed the jars.  I am sooooo glad I have a meat slice, makes them uniform and it makes it much faster and easier.  Cubbie helped me peel them with the potato peeler, she is very good at it, who knew.  I got 11 quarts.  I process one batch of 7 with a tighten and turn back 1/4 inch.  The second batch had the 3 spaghetti jars from the 1/4 turn turn back and 4 quarts of carrots.  I prayed this method would work better, it did all 14 jars sealed.  I went on to make 10 jars of mixed spicy pickled veggies.  I used all the rest of the carrot, broccoflower, broccoli, pablano peppers, cucumbers from the BBFC basket, plus I added red peppers, mushrooms, garlic, cauliflower, horseradish, minced garlic, whole pepper corn, black mustard seeds, dill, apple cider vinegar, salt and water.  I can't wait for the 6 weeks to see how they turn out.  I think that I have finally gotten the Tattler's figured out, the last two batches 100 percent success in sealing.  I think I love them, I am keeping the boxes they come into store them in as they are kind of fragile and need to be kept right to make them the economical blessing they are meant to be.

Poppie has been tilling the garden the last couple of days.  We have nearly a 1/5 of an acre of garden and will be expanding a new area so will have a 1/4 acre soon.  We are going to be putting in a cellar around the pump so it will be a pump house/cellar.  The garden expansion will be around the cellar.  We have lots of excess cardboard boxes from the BBFC and part of our responsibility is to upcycle them.  No one in our town recycles them, to far from a recycling center to make them even worth the gas.  Poppie has decided he is going to run them throw a chipper and mix them with goat manure for building up his new expanse of garden.  I can't wait to see what the end result is.  I think it will be a lot of new topsoil.  Win win.  Poppie was tilling last night after the kids had gone home, but our little Bubbles came to the garden fence and begged to be lifted over to spend time with Nannie and Poppie.  She kept begging ice cubes from my glass of ice water, I almost shuddered to put the ice cube in her little dirty hand, but the best way to be immune to germs is to have them as part of your life.  She loved running threw Poppie's newly tilled soil.  She would sit in it and throw it up in the air, it rained down on her like sweet rain.  She had a great time and since Poppie has to till several more time to let the weeds dry out and die in the sunshine, he let her play to her hearts content.  The joys of a sunshiny spring.

The older kids were riding their bikes up and down the road at break neck speeds, well it seem like it to me. The were playing in the old pond catching newts.  Cubbie calls them salamanders, or the way she say it "Samalanders".  I found one the other day in the goat pen, I had tipped the water trough over and there lay one.  It was all in a ball I thought dead but Poppie said it was just cold.  I picked it up and gave it to Cubbie, it warmed in her hand and soon crawled up her sleeve.  She giggled in delight.  She and Poppie took it over to the old pond and released it.  Mokie said later they could catch a few for the fish tank.  We learned a few years ago they are easy to keep as they love dog food.  It makes for a dirty tank but they love it.  They had been playing a little while when one had to tell on the other.  I dislike tattling almost more than anything in a child, I having been a victim of it as a child have never abided it in my kids or my grands.  I always asked them if it is a tell or a tattle, tells are for the safety of another child, tattles are just because you are being mean and didn't get your way.  They all know the difference.  One came to tattle and I told them to go work it out amongst themselves.  All in all a wonderful spring evening with our little family. 

I hope that today brings you the boundless love of God,  I hope his word is heard in your heart, I hope today is the day you respond to the voice of God.  He calls endlessly to the lost, today is the day of Grace... tomorrow.

Friday, April 26, 2013

Tattlers, my first foray into using them.....

Yesterday day was the day.  I had bought a case of roma tomatoes from BBFC last week.  I had put in an order through a new co-op to buy Tattler jar lids, at the same time I had found a great deal on Tattler Jars lids on eBay.  I figured since I needed so many of them if I like them, which I should because even counting the original cost, which are greater, the fourth time I use them they are essentially free, win win.  The eBay ones were also a deal because I could get them right away where as the co-op will take longer to get them.  I got my first ones on Wednesday, Lady had gotten some with me so I dropped hers off yesterday.  I decided that yesterday would be the day of trial, knowing I would probably have errors.  I read about them on several blogs, some of which sang their praises in all applications,  some liked them only for water bath but not pressure canning.  There seems to be a bit of a technique to use them.  The best info is that you simmer the lids and rubber rings in water, put them on the jar and make sure they are centered well on the jars.  You put on the metal ring and tighten loosely even backing the ring back off of tight a quarter turn.  Unlike when you use a metal lid the Tattler lid and rubber need to be able to move a little during the cooking process, again unlike when you use metal rings, which you never tighten when you take them out of the canner, you immediately tighten the Tattler lids tight.  You can not leave them in the canner to seal, you definitely have to take them out and tighten them as soon as possible. 

I spent all of yesterday morning making spaghetti sauce.  I halved the tomatoes from an entire case of roma tomatoes added a quart of beef stock and set them to simmer in the pressure canner I was not going to can in.  I recently lost my stainless steel 20 quart pan.  It was part and parcel of the demise of my stove.  It actually welded to the burner in the middle of making lemonade concentrate.  I so miss my big pan, it only has a pin hole hole in it but beings as it is stainless steel it is not easily fixed and not worth the cost to do so.  I digress.  I set the tomatoes to simmer and began to chop the veggies I would add after I had cooked and sieved them.  I did add all the fresh herb bundles I had gotten from BBFC recently, which included sage, thyme, and rosemary.  I also added some dry oregano, parsley, onion salt, onion powder, garlic salt, garlic powder and coco powder to the pot to season the tomatoes as them cooked and simmer, oh, and 10 cups of roasted pumpkin and one small eggplant.  I chopped onions, red and green peppers, pablano peppers, garlic and olive oil to sauté in a pan.  Sautéed I set them aside to wait for the tomatoes.  Once the tomatoes were cooked I put them through my sieve to make them into sauces.  Once all was sauced I put them back into the canner pan, added the sautéed veggies, brown sugar, chili powder and 8 cans of tomato paste,  simmered to my desired thickness. Spaghetti sauce made I was ready to use my Tattlers, yay. 

I put the jar lids, rubbers and rings on as I had been instructed.  I processed them, took them out of the water, tightened up the lids, set them on the counter to cool. I ended up with 13 quarts and 4 pints. This morning I will see if they are sealed.  I must admit I missed the satisfaction of hearing the metal lids pop, a sort of song that tells you your jars are sealed.  We have just checked them and the first batch that I made, that I didn't unscrew back the quarter turn but just tighten loosely as stated on the box did not seal, but the two batches that I did make sure to turn back the quarter turn did seal.  I am glad I kept the batches separate so I would know what I did to make them seal or not seal, I am also glad I had a heads up that their would be a learning curve to use them.  I think over all once I get to know them I will like them but since I do have to reprocess a batch this morning I am glad I can see the value in using them and not obsess on my failure.  I will remember to turn the rubber over as that is suggest for best reuse, and remember my techniques that works. 

We ended the day yesterday with Grandpa coming over to help Poppie wither the two little piglets Reese and Pretzel.  They made lots of noise but all turned out well, they are growing like weeds, Poppie could barely hold them, he actually had to set on them to hold them for the neutering.  He said they are easily 25 pounds, maybe 30, apiece so they are growing like weeds, as they are supposed to. 

I hope your day is wonderful, I pray the Lord blesses you and fulfills you needs.  I hope he allows tribulations to the ones that needs to know of his comfort.  I hope you seek his grace..... tomorrow.

Thursday, April 25, 2013

30,000, and 800, on track for the most veiwed month, a new page to come, I never thought I would be here......

Writing this blog has been an adventure and I never cease to be amazed that anyone ever wanted to read my ramblings.  I started my adventure in February of 2011 and today I write my 800th blog page.  Today I hit 30,000 thousand page views and if only half of those page views were people that actually read I am honored that 15,000 times someone stopped in to read what I have had to say, maybe even 20,000, think of that!  This month I am on track to have the most page views in one month.  There were those original almost six months that it took me to get to having a 1,000 page views and this month I could make 2,000 in one month.  I have decided that I will start a new page, not a new blog.  I actually know people that write a blog for awhile and refind themselves, or change and think that change means a new blog; not me I think that my blog is a representation of my changes, growth and becoming and those of you that followed along have shared my journey.  Well I am not going anywhere so stay tuned.  I have decided that I do want to complete one of my original intents for this blog that I have sadly ignored.  I want to set down all my recipes as a cookbook of sorts for my kids and grands.  I fully intend to write a handwritten on for each of my five as I do so cherish any thing that I have written by my Grandmothers but I also want to write down a story of recipes and here is the best forum I think.  I will add my meandering in recipes as a new page in the next few days.  I have decided I will add them straight out of my handwritten cookbook, not out of it once I get it organized into a concept that will be the handwritten cookbooks.  I feel that if I write it in order of that way it is currently written it may say something about the need for the recipes and show a timeline of needs in our family as it grew.  I may change but that is how I will begin.

I began this blog, as I have said before, for my child, my grands and for the one lost soul that might read my meandering and open up the Bible and hear the word of God.  I have not deviated in a major way from that first desire to write this blog.  I just find that I may have not have full filled the recipe aspect of the blog I had original wanted to add so hope to correct that.  I do think I have represented my daily life with the girls and grands well.  I have mouthed off at times about my politics, I have mouthed off about my tribulations and trials and again I have mouthed of in despair, in times of desperation and in times of sorrow. I have shared my joys, my loves and my life.  I thank all who have begun this journey with me, have continued on it with me and will stay to see how I progress.  I thank those of you that have listened to my faith become stronger and have opened you hearts and Bible to the Lord.  Most off all I thank the Lord for his Grace is allowing me to partake of his Grace. 

Thank you for 30,000 and 800, that you read sings to my heart, that I am of interest to you amazes me and thank you for listening to my encouragement to seek the Lord in your life and I pray it has helped you seek out his grace and love.... tomorrow. 

Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Joy, service to others or the center of your world.....

Anyone that spends any amount of time with a child knows that part of the development of a child is self centeredness.  An infant's world is all about them, we all were once the most important thing in our lives.  You can watch the growth of an infant to toddlerhood as they go from spontaneous self centered behavior to after a short period of time they demand self centeredness.  As a child grows they learn empathy, sympathy, love of others and service are more important than the world revolving around them, well I guess some people do.  Maybe it was, that is how a child used to be raised but more and more children are being raised into entitlement.  I am not just talking about the entitlement that the government fights about.  Yes, there are those that are the victims of generational welfarism and that is the way they are raised but that is not the only entitlement that is burdening our society and in the end destroying it. 

We hear daily the loud screams about welfare recipients, the people on Medicare,  Medicaid and Social Security but what about the entitled that are looking down their noses at these but working the system in ways these groups haven't got a clue about.  What about the overly educated that feel they are owed an education on the backs of others but think they are better than the "uneducated people on the system"?  The way I see it these people are some of the biggest hypocrites in our society, they are entitled to their education and they deserved all those grants, yet they scream loudly about all the users on the system never realizing they are cut from the same cloth but are so self centered they don't see it.  What about the Occupy Wall-Streeter's from last year, they were all over the news screaming about the one percenters but in the end when time evolved and we got to see who they really were it was found that most of them were part and parcel of the one percenters, they ended up just being more of the entitled self centered youth that wanted to make headlines and the main stream media were played like a song by them.  Funny how all of a sudden the mainstream media just didn't talk about them any more and they faded away with no embarrassing explanation or revelations by them. The entitled are many, and I have not the space here to detail them all, but our society grows newly birthed factions each day, week and year.

I had occasion just lately to listen to a young person telling about how she was raised right.  Her parent raised her up right, disciplined her and made her into what she is now, admirable.   Had that been where the conversation stopped it would have been a wonderful testimony but the young person went on to say that she was the only person she knew raise so in this day and age.  She saw herself as the only example of being raise right, that because of this she and her mother had the only relationship she knew as close as they are.  She saw no one else as good as her relationship with her mother, she became the self centered persons she was trying to be better than, sad.  I think she may be has a special relationship with her mom, and that is wonderful, but why does her blessing have to be better than the blessings that others share and were given to them by God with their parents? Though entitlement expounds it is not the whole of our society, there are people still raising their children right it is just he exception not the rule now.

I don't believe anyone can love any one else unless they love themselves first, well right after their love of God.  I don't believe that loving yourself is about serving yourself first though, it's just that having love for yourself  makes you know how to love others.  I think that serving in J-O-Y is important.  We should serve Jesus-Others-and Yourself, Joy, in that order.  Entitlement has nothing to do with J-O-Y, and all to do with what I can get for the least amount of effort in this life.  Jesus knows our hearts and asks us to serve and be humbled, I don't think that entitlement and God plans for us are simpatico by any stretch of the imagination.  I hope you remember to love yourself, but the love the Lord more.  I hope you remember to serve yourself but do it after you have served the Lord, and after you have served your fellowman.  I hope you remember that this life is about service, repentance and God's grace and no one is entitled to any of those....... tomorrow.

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Home again, home again jiggity jog.... Can goat and kids be therapy?

Poppie got to his appointment on time and I got to read a magazine.  I was reading the Smithsonian, it had some interesting articles.  One on the primitive peoples of the Amazon and the Colombia river drainage.  I thought it was interesting that one of the most primitive that still exists was originally one that had it's long houses at the mouth of the Amazon but when the Spaniard came they picked up and moved 150 miles up the river and reestablished.  They were found again in the early 1900's and some of them destroyed by civilization.  One tribe was greatly effected and assimilated into the rubber trade but when it collapsed they again disappeared only to be discovered in 1969.  The men who discovered them were never seen again.  Now because of the destruction of one of the tribes when found in modern times another tribe has advocates trying to protect them.  The country has established a park and trying to use the assimilated tribe member to act as a go between.  It was an interesting article and I do it no justice.  I read another article about the Pilgrims it was a fascinating look into the real story, as opposed to the nearly fairy tale rendition, we teach our children.  NO one got beheaded by John Smith in the Pilgrim tales I remembered.  It was an enlightening story.  I never thought of new world colonization as the fulfillment of Revelations either but the author of the article seems to think that the Pilgrims saw the first Americans, or Native Americans, as the devils minions of Revelations.  It made me wonder do all generations think they are living in the end times.  If so it is something to contemplate... hmmm. 

We left the Dr after an hour and went to the Human Resources, it is an organization where people donate unwanted lumber and other things from houses that have been torn down or remodeled, a true upcycling experience.  I had seen a couple of small bathroom cupboards that had been taken out of a 40's or 50 circa house.  They were 60 apiece last week when I saw them, they were 30 apiece yesterday.  Poppie whined about them, he was in a lot of pain and spent a great deal of the day grouchy.  I went up to pay for them and the man sold them to me for 50 which was so cool.  I also got tile, 12x12 pieces,  I got 87 most of them still in full case boxes.  I got them for 75 cents they are normally 3 dollars each at the box stores.  I was so excited to get such good quality flooring for I assumed my bathroom but when all was said and done we decided that I had gotten enough to use it in the pantry.  I got pantry cupboards and floor, can't wait to get it done.  I have to finish up the kitchen and then we will be working on the pantry, yay. 

We feed Professor's rabbits on the way home, picked up the girls from school and arrived home.  Mokie and kids were at our house before we got into the house.  We all went out to the goat pen, feed them and Yogie milked.  Poppie seemed to loosen up a little and was not so grouchy the rest of the day.  It was nice that he was back to himself.  Maybe kids and kids are a magic pill?  I started carrying in the tile, Poppie helped.  I am going to count each color (okay so buying tile at killer prices does mean you have to make some adjustments, no, they are not all the same color)  and  make them into a pattern much like when I plan a quilt.  I think it should turn out great, imagine a giant quilt on my pantry floor, now that will really be me, don't you think?  I hope you have a great day.  I know not if every generation does think it is the last but I do know that every generation does need to be prepared for the recoming of Jesus like they are.  Are you ready for the coming of the Lord?  If not you should be.  He has known of you since the foundation of time isn't it the time to you got to know him? ...... tomorrow.   

Monday, April 22, 2013

Zootown with Poppy, Dr, Human Resources, busy day to come....

No grands today which will be nice, I am sure they will be over to visit later but their mom will be home all day, she gets three days in a row off, yay.  Today we got to go the Zoo, Poppy has a long appointment today, they usually take about an hour.  Zootown trips are never pleasant with Poppy especially when he is sore,  there is 4 good inches of snow in my yard so Poppy is sore from just the weather not counting any others things that make him sore.  He tends to be extra grumpy on days like this, he can be the nicest of people, most always, but there are days when he is just plain mean and grumpy and those days usually coincide with Zootown trips in bad weather. 

I got the baskets taken to the BBFC VSC for the Thompson Falls site.  She was a very nice person I got to meet her husband as well.  It was snowing and blowing on the trip back from dropping them off.  I found out that they have a Friday night drop, I would love to have had a Friday night drop for me but I am sure it would have caused hardship for some one else.  I think the change from 5:15 to 11:30 was good for some but I have heard that for others it was a hardship.  I suppose that is the case with most things when you try to make a broad scope of people happy at one thing.  I guess in the end it is what it is.  The most important part is that we get great produce and we share the experience.

I have several more things to get done before we go this morning.  I think we have to stop and feed Professors rabbits on the way home as well.  I hope to get back to my painting and tiling.  We are going to stop at Human Resources so Poppy can check out some of the things there.  I am hoping to get some tile to do the bathroom floor.  I don't like the carpet in there and know that laminate is not a good option so I want to do tile.  I think that with my quirky house that a mixed mosaic of tile would work great so we will see what I can find.  I also saw some great cupboards from the 40's or the 50's that I wanted to show Poppy on the chance that he might think they would work in the pantry.  Off we go.  I hope that the Lord holds you in his arms today and every day..... tomorrow.

Sunday, April 21, 2013

How do you see life, what does your perspective say about you.......

The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails.

I heard someone quote this verse this morning.  It was intriguing to me.  It sort of spoke to my thinking.  It definitely made me contemplate. Do you know anyone that isn't one of the above?  I know a lot of people that try to be one or may even think they are one when they are really one of the others, do you?  Poppie is definitely a pessimist, he is always thinking on the half empty side of things.  I think I am an optimist but it just might be that I am a realist, or could it be that I am an optimist pretending to be a realist?  I know that they are all fancy words, and for the most part fancy words are overbearing and not worth the space they are typed on but these word to have deeper means and lead us to such different places in our lives

The pessimist is one of the most frustrating people to be around, they see rain in ever cloud, they see failure and demise in all they peruse.  They sit and think of things that could happen, do you know one?  I kind of think of them when I see Pigpen in the Charlie Brown comic, he always has a cloud of dust following him,  I imagine the pessimist with their little rain clouds following them ready to rain on their parades.  I think for the most part pessimist look for and find optimist to have relationships with, they are pessimist not sadists,  they want and need some one to balance out their seeing of danger around every corner.  Just by their nature optimist want to better everyone's days so they seek someone to cheer up.  Pessimist never know what hit them, so in the end the pessimist probably wasn't looking for an optimist to share their life with they got kidnapped by one.....hmmm.  Really though I do spend a lot of time trying to shield Poppy from his own worries. 

The optimist can be frustrating in their own right, really is their a rainbow under every weed?  Living half full can mean that the cup runs over sooner than the half empty cup, well sort of, half is half after all.  I think that optimist are more fun to be around in general.  NO gloom, no doom but with all that sunshine you can need sunscreen for your own protection on occasion.  You know what I mean, every thing is going to be sunshine and flowers, but the reality is that all things don't turn out happy all the time.  Ut oh, reality rears its ugly head. 

Okay, so I have been found out, I am probably not the optimist I have said I was on occasion.  I do tend to be half full but in the end it is a realistic half full.  I don't see rainbows around every corner, I don't think all will be sunshine and roses all the time.  I do believe in God all can be but God didn't make this life to be all sunshine and roses, he made it as place where we are tried, where we have trials and tribulations.  He made it a place where we can work toward a better us, a place where through pain we bare children, raise our loving little infants and toddlers in to the rebellious teen that thinks we are stupider that dirt.  It is a place where we love our kids, are friend and our families but none, not one, of them are perfect.  None, not one of us is perfect,  well only one every was, Our Lord Jesus, sent to us by God, but for the rest of us, not one.  God does not stop all bad actions, he allows us to use our free well, he allows bad action, he allows good actions,  he allows us to love. 

So maybe in the end we are all a combination of the three, some of us may portray one or the other more often and can be mistermed a pessimist, an optimist or a realist but we are all just human beings with all the free well that God gave us to make the choices for ourselves.  We don't understand all the reason God lets us endure but endure we do.  It is the reality that earth in not heaven.  A place where all will be sunshine and roses all the time, a place of glory, no tears and no sorrows.  Today, on earth, is a place in need of the pessimist, the optimist and the reality check of the realist.  Tomorrow in glory, is salvation, praising God forever, a place where no pessimist or realist need be, a place where the optimist no longer is needed as all is glory..... tomorrow.

Saturday, April 20, 2013

BBFC delays on our first B Week, winter grows to long, and the Ladies conquered the Wolf so to speak....

Yesterday my emails were a busy with the weather systems of a state away.  I never considered the weather in another state would make so much difference on my Saturday.  I mean I do realize that sometimes a weather event in ND or AZ would come to my attention because of my kids and grands, in those states, but for the most part if it isn't something that I can see out my window it doesn't make that much difference in my life. See I am like the meteorologist I look out the window, I digress, but doesn't it seem sometimes like that's what they do?  Anyway, yesterday it started coming through in emails that the trucks that bring the produce to our BBFC sites in Montana are delayed in Wyoming.  We were supposed to have had our first drop at 10:30 this morning and now the drop isn't to come until 12:30 if they stay on the current proposed schedule.  I am hoping they do, I have a road trip with the Ladies, Mokie and Littles after.  Poppie and I have to make a run tomorrow to drop of BBFC baskets, so another trip, then and on Monday Poppie has a DR appointment, a larger than usual one and then I am taking him to Human Resources so the next three day will allow for no painting time, or tiling.  I am so excited with my new kitchen I can't keep from mentioning it, even in passing.  I got all my teapots washed and up in new places.  I am gather the large pieces from their stored spots to display, so far the room looks good well except for all the work that isn't done, funny how my house always looks the worse before the better, sort of like the dark before the dawn.  Okay, so it has been a long winter, with the new wave we have had in last couple week, I may be getting a little stir crazy and silly but who knows it may just be me.

My Ladies have been practicing their MCT play, an adaptation of Red Riding Hood, this week.  They had two showings of the play yesterday, we got to go to the evening performance with the other proud parents.  I filmed the whole thing, my first try at using the video camera, Poppie says the results are much better than his taping of the Christmas concert, Spring Concert next week, so more to tape soon.  The kids all did great and the program is such a blessing to all involved.  My Ladies were shadows and fires, they both did a good job.  Almost all of the kids get at least a small speaking part, well except for the really little ones, mine had a few lines each and two songs.  I think they were proud of their accomplishments and isn't that the desired design in the end?  They worked hard all week and had their day in the lime light.  I am glad they got to be a part of such a good thing.  I am also so thankful for the adults that put such time and energy into making this happen.  Kudos to one and all.  I do know in the end I am very thankful it is only a annual event.  My Booboo is a bear, pun intended.  She does not do late very well and in our family anything after 8 is late, she hasn't been to bed all week before 8:30 or 9 so long week.  She is a grouch and I am letting her sleep this morning hoping that she will find her sweet self in her dreams..... 

I am going to finish up my coffee, do a little work in my kitchen and then start on all my obligations for the next few days.  I hope the Lord bless your day.  I know he has blessed the peoples of Boston this morning, praise be to him the terror is over.  I do so wish that the PC climate in this current time would just get over itself and let people wake up to the reality of Jihad.  We are open to such victimization in this country because of our entitlement life styles, PC culture and the turning away from God.  We need to, as a country, turn back to our Savior and ask for his love, his grace and his forgiveness before the Jihadist destroy us from our own stupidity and lack of faith.  They certainly haven't turned their backs on their faith and their god. May your faith be renewed, reborn or may  it be as an epiphany at last in your life, may you finally hear the word of God calling to your soul, it is not to late but the time is coming when it will be.... tomorrow.  

Friday, April 19, 2013

Kitchen painted, the ways we spend the days of our lives vary so......

I got all of the kitchen painted, well as much as I could with the roller and standing on the ladder and on my cupboards.  I still had to have Poppie come in and finish off the corners near the ceiling.  Our ceiling are cathedral so are right at 12 feet at their highest.  It looks wonderful.  I hadn't had my teapots down from atop the cupboards since I had put them up there nearly 5 years ago, I rarely take them down as they are hard to clean and some very fragile.  I once had as many as 140 teapots at the height of my collection, I have in the last few years gifted some and generally whittled down the girth of the collection.  I noticed when I had them all down that our ceilings looked much taller and I liked the look so I am going to put them in a different place.  I think since the new divider is 12 inches thick and is viewable from both sides I will put them there instead and make the divider more closed but still not attached to the ceiling, it will give the room more of a new look.  I have decided I will replace the teapots atop the cupboard with some  of the large odd antiques I haven't had space for in my house and have had in storage in the barn.  I have an antique coffee grinder, a sausage maker, some washboards and things like that that you can't really display with out space.  They will now have space where littles can't go so they will all be safe in a new home.  All those things that I once had space for in my old long gone house, things that say something about me and my likes.  I hadn't really thought I would every get to have them in my kitchen again how excited that they just sort of found a place. 

I was listening to the radio as I drove Yogie into Zootown on Wednesday and I heard the most interesting statistic.  I have contemplated it and thought about it since.  Okay, so painting really makes the mind wonder to odd places.   The man on the radio was giving the hours women spend using lotion, taking care of their hair, putting on make up and removing it and painting their nail, most of which I have long ago given up but I digress.  Anyway the man gave the hours the average woman spends in a life time doing each, I don't recall the specific amount for each, but the combined total hours was a year of their lives.  I was truly amazed at the time.  I am reluctant to say the time is wasted but I down deep I do think so.  I know that we all are allowed to spend our time as we please and it seems that a great many woman spend a lot of their lives in a futile endeavor.  Really, and if one year is the average how much time do the truly obsessed primpers  waste?  I wonder what things one could do with all that time?  I guess we all get to use our time as we see fit but I am thinking that some of that mirror time could be used in other manners.  I can't imagine that I will ever be able to look at a perfectly quaffed woman again, with a straight face, as she bewails her lack of time to get things done.  Okay, I did say painting was truly a mind numbing pursuit, but it does make we wonder what could be done in the lives of these perfectly pampered prima donnas? 

I have more painting to do today, teapots to rearrange and plans about tiling to make.  BBFC paperwork to prepare and get ready for tomorrow, so who knows what thinks I will think as I go about my day.  I hope the Lord calls to you in your life, I hope he gives you things to do that would help you decide to chose differently how to spend part of that year of your life on his praises and work.... tomorrow.

Thursday, April 18, 2013

Mantle found, Gertie, painting coming alone well..... faith.

Yogie had a good day at the dentist.  She still has 6 teeth to finish growing in and then the last brackets can go on,  by Christmas her braces should be all done.  She had a tech that she had never had before.  She was very nice.  Yogie told her about her goats and she was enthralled as she has always wanted a goat.  She said she would love a goat and would name one Gertie.  Yogie and I told her that that was a good name and that we were always looking for good names.  We name our goats the same as the first letter of their moms name and since we have two G named mammas we are always looking for good G names.  She was excited to think that she would have an honorary goat of her chosen name.  I thought it was funny the name she chose it reminded me or when after Goofy was born Poppie wanted to name his next daughter Gertrude Sue.  It took me quite awhile to convince him that that was not a good name.  Mokie hates her name but is resolved to it now, isn't she lucky that her dad didn't get to name her Gertrude Sue, a much worse name in the end I am thinking.  We found out that Yogies dentist is going to Africa as part of a local church to do dental work for the people in need there.  She is getting to take her daughter, what a blessing for her and her child, the people of Tanzania, praise be to God.  It will be a lifetime of memories for her and her teenager, what a wondrous memories they will take home.  I was so excited for them.  She is the loveliest of people.

Yogie and I stopped at Human Resource to check on some slabs I had seen on their newsletter.  Poppie had just said he wanted a blue board to finish up our mantle.  Yogie and I found the exact one, it had blue and old aged grey on the outside of it.  Poppie is going to sand the face and as we now have all the components we will soon have our perfect mantle done.  We ate and came home, I dropped Yogie off at school and was soon at the house.  I got to painting right away.  I got most of the kitchen done, some of the wrap around into the front room, there is a cut out in the my living room so I two toned the paint from the kitchen into the living room.  It really does look nice.  As I painted I had time to contemplate, well don't you? painting is not rocket science so there is time to day dream.  Anyway as I contemplated it dawned on me that the two colors I was painting, one I got from my mother so didn't actually pick, were the same two (or very nearly) colors as Lady's last two kitchen colors.  Funny we have both picked the same paprika color and hadn't know it.  I think we just must like the same color palette, okay I did say it was mind numbing to paint walls....  I digress.

I finished painting and made 'Goosebumps' and stir fry for dinner, well for the kids, grands and I, Poppie got hamburger steak, gravy and corn.  Bubbles and Cubbie gobbled theirs all up.  Imagine a 16 month old that can't get enough veggies that she has to shovel them in, funny to watch her with her little fork in her left hand.  My grandfather was left handed and my dad should have been but was not allowed to be as a child.  I can't think of any others in our family.  Poppie took the girls to, and retrieved them from, play practice and our day was gone.

I was watching something so unremarkable that I can't right off remember what it was, when some one said show me.  It made me think of how so many want to be shown before they can have faith.  I remember as a young person actually praying for a sign but then is that faith?  I thought of how the Pharisees wanted Jesus to do something more to prove he was the son of God.  Is that faith?  I know as I age I have more and more come to understand what faith is.   It is not needing to have a sign to be persuaded to believe it is the pure and simple belief that some thing is with out some one having to prove it.  Andrew, Peter, James and John believed and follow just because Jesus said "come", he didn't not have to prove anything to them they believed, they had faith.  I hear every day why should I believe, show me why, that is not faith.  Faith is believing like a child, just because it is.  We need to have faith like a child, how pure that a child believes in ways we struggle to obtain..... Hebrews 11:1 Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen........ tomorrow.

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Ortho day, Zootown, Painting, grands and play practice all in on short day.

Yogie and I are off to the Zoo in the next few minutes.  Yogie has an ortho appointment, one of her last few teeth will be getting its bracket and one still hasn't gotten in enough to have the bracket put on it. Once the brackets are finally on it will only be about another 7 months of braces.  I will be glad that they are done.  Funny thing her braces will be all done by the time that most kids get theirs on.  I am so glad that her dentist is ahead of the curve for some of the young kids like Yogie.  Had we waited until she was the normal age she would have lost several adult teeth.  Her mouth did not have the room for the teeth to even come in, so by putting the braces on younger the dentist was able to expand her palette as it grew to make room for all the teeth to have a place to grow in to. 

Booboo has asked us to pick up 30 crickets for the class lizard, I have a couple small stops and then home.  Yogie back to school so she and Booboo can go to play practice this evening. They both got parts in the MCT play.  It is really a blessing the that the MCT program has grown and expanded like it has over the years, world wide now.  Children who would not otherwise get a chance at a large product, well so to speak, play get to through their efforts.  I remember being in their plays as a kids when the program was in its fledgling years.  They are working on an adaptation of Red Riding Hood.  The performance will be on Friday.

I have grands to watch this afternoon shortly after I get home, or maybe they will be here when I get home.  I have painting to do in my kitchen.  I have gotten part of the kitchen done.  I am only painting a relatively small area of the kitchen but I have to move lots of stuff paint, then move it back, move more stuff so a slow process.  I will be glad when that kitchen is done.  I am going to paint the front room and both bathrooms as well.  I have tiling to do in the kitchen and some kind of flooring to put down in the pantry and one of the bathrooms.  The girls rooms will come next, flooring and painting.  I am excited to get it done and new beginning to come. 

Well have to run, crack the whip on the tooth brushing.  I hope the Lord holds you in his arms this day.... tomorrow. 

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

How we count the days, especially the ones that we never forget where we were at a moment in time......

I remember the day that John Kennedy died.  I was only three and I know a lot of people say kids can't remember things that long ago.  I have a remarkable memory, always have, I get it from my Dad and am saddened that  his is gone to an extreme that makes your heart break.  I often worry that I will go the way he has, I truly hope not.  I remember in vivid detail all sorts of things, I can remember back to where I was 18 months and have 90 distinct memories prior to being 5, but I digress.  I remember that day John Kennedy died.  It was my brothers first birthday.  I remember that my mom was shocked and crying.  She ran all the way from our house to the sawmill, where my dad worked, it was really only across a field more or less.  When she got to my dad she told him "The President is dead they shot him".  My dad said, "I don't doubt it", unphased, he is like that the driest sense of humor in the world.  My mother was still devastated and not happy with his response.  It was one of those moments in your life you never forget, I don't think at three it was the historic value of the death I remember but the extreme action of my mother I remember and her sorrow.  I have many of those type of memories of my family events, as we all do, but then there are the other events that shouldn't even effect us, because they are not personal to us, they happen to those we don't even know but do.  They can devastate us...

I remember every second of the first hours of the 911 horror.  I remember the tears streaming down my face as I watched, glued to my TV alone, those towers being hit by the planes, the people coming out, the south tower and then the north towers coming down.  I watched, as others did, while they looked for survivors and sobbed in horror that not only were there no survivors but the bodies of nearly 3000 people were just gone.  They were a part of the rubbles of the destruction.  The worst civilian tragedy  in our history.  I would love to go to the memorial but I will probably never get to go to the east in my life so will probably not see it.  My Grandmother Gladys once told me about getting to go to  the memorial in Hawaii where the Arizona lies.  She told me that is was the closest she had ever been to God.  She said you could feel the sorrow but you could feel the Salvation of God and his love there as well.  I would imagine I would feel that at the 911 memorial or I would hope that I would, how glorious that must be.  I think in a little way I can imagine the comfort the loved ones of the victims feel about the memorials.

Yesterday will be another of those days I will remember exactly what I did all afternoon.  The bomb blasts and the tragic loss of life, the horror and the senseless carnage.  How can the evils of this earth pray upon the truly innocent.  The terrorist that do these kind of things to those who have no fault in the evil they perpetuate.  The people murdered and maimed had no part in the terrorist cause.  They were families enjoying a happy day of fun, the celebration of freedom and a holiday.  Satan does live in this world and his minions are never at rest working toward his goals.  We are left to sorrow for the lost, the ones who's lives are never going to be the same.  I praise God that the medic from the marathon were there to save so many of the ones that lost limbs.  That 911 gave them advance notice to be so orderly ready for more terrorist acts.  I praise God that the bombs went off in a slower point in the marathon so that the casualties were less than they could have been.  I praise God that there were not mass causalities which there could have been in a different moment.  I pray to God for all those involved and that they find some comfort in their pain, I pray that they seek it in God .....tomorrow.

Monday, April 15, 2013

Piglet weigh in.... Poppie vegged.

We had a nice day at Church.  We sang happy birthday to Poppie and praised the Lord.  It is always comforting, joyous and wonderful to go to Church.  We get to go renew our faith and study the Word, all soul filling.  I know that sounds cliché but isn't that how something becomes a cliché, because it is truth most of the time.  I don't want to suggest that Chruch is cliché because it isn't but the wondrous feelings you can get from going can be so good that it almost seems cliché to talk about it.  I don't find Church a routine other than the going should be routine.  God wants us there so he can give us communal blessings.  The blessings of being in an assembly with other people sharing the praising of the Lord.  The feeling of a family chosen by God, in a different way than the family he gave you at birth.  Regardless, we had a glorious day at Church, can't ever day at Church be glorious just because you got to worship the Lord?

We got home from Church and had to go right out and take the piglets to the weigh in.  The piglets were many, I think around 30 or so.  I got to worrying about ours, because of all our troubles ours are very young, short of 4 weeks.  They are big for their age but young.  Some of the piglets were nearly 80 lbs.  I talked to the MSU extension agent, not sure of his exact title.  I explained the problems, he did know of our Miss Chops melt down.  I asked if the girls would be disqualified, he said "no."  He said they were like me it was the experience that was the most important.  He also said if feed right the piglets might make the weights needed by the Fair.  210 to 280 lbs.  If they are fed right and if they are thrives and  good eaters.  One other 4-her had small piglets as well he is from Alberton.  His piglets and ours weighed in at 15 lbs each, so at least the girls won't be alone in their task to make the right weight, if not they will have learned a lot and worked hard and isn't that the point of 4-h.

Poppie refused to go to the weigh in.  It was his birthday after all and he got to spend it anyway he wanted.  He went to Church and spent the afternoon watching 4 hours of Moby Dick, a two part movie.  He had a great time.  The Ladies and I made him his cake, his masked potaoes and sawmill gravy he was in a simple man's heaven.  Imagine a day spent praising the Lord and looking to the glory of heaven then getting to come home and spend the afternoon in your heaven on earth, a blessing to be sure.... tomorrow.

Sunday, April 14, 2013

Poppies B-day.... just another day of the year, ask him....

Well the road trip yesterday was a great success.  The Ladies each got a great piglet, a little young but nice and fat; made loud hungry noises in my front room bright and early this morning so the Ladies were up feeding them.  They are in a dog kennel, my bathroom is off limits.  I even bought new paint to paint both bathrooms, so no more baby anythings in there again, well I will make an exception for two footed ones but that's a near thing in itself.  The old farmer we got the piglets from is truly a fine old gentleman.  He is a retired railroad engineer.  We got there toured his farm, saw all his wonderful pigs, sows, market pigs and piglets, 14 in all, his whole operation was probably 30.  We had a great visit and then it was time to leave.  My car would not start the battery cable that has been giving us problems on occasion was missed up.  He spent the next hour and a half fixing it up for me, in the cold blowing wind and it was very cold, a little hale as well.  He would not hear of us being out in it with him and insisted we go into the farm house with his wife.  I felt so bad, but he was a stellar lovely old gentleman and there are few of them in this day and age.  Truly a loving soul.  He had had hernia surgery on Thursday on top of it all.  Poppie called him to thank him when we got home. 

I had originally planned on making a quick stop at the Amish store but the car problem made me think we didn't have time.  The Ladies had to be home to sing at 3:20 to sing at the nursing home.  The Gentleman told me the car would not be a problem again so I could go ahead and make a quick stop.  I was terrible we did stop for about 15 minutes, but I didn't turn off the car just in case, there was no need in the end to have left it on, it was well and truly fixed.  I would have stopped at Twins but she had a family emergency that I had read about on FB so she wasn't home anyway.  Her hubbie is in the hospital and I pray doing better.  We got some nice finds at the Amish store but not all of what we need so going back soon.  Will stop at Twin's next time, and my just make Poppie go so he can meet our Gentleman. 

Today is Poppie's birthday, he does not want a fuss.  It is just another day of the year don't you know.  He is going to make us get the pigs all moved around.  Charcoal in his pen, Miss Chops moved and ready to go to the butcher.  The other two small pigs will be in with the new piglets when done,  the one with the anal prolapse is seemingly doing okay, the prolapse has retracted and has not come out again so may be okay for growing into a whole hog for the 4th but if not the other one will and we will eat piglet soon.  Chocolate and Red need to be moved, the spring rain has wet their pen.  The new piglets are Reese and Pretzel.   The Ladies named them after our road trip, and they got pretzels and reeses cup as treats, so Pretzel and Reese it is. 

The Ladies and I are going to make mashed potatoes and sawmill gravy for Poppie later and of course we will have his favorite, Black forest cake.  They each made him cards and Cubbie got to sign one.  A simple man asks for simple things and I can't think of a simpler dinner.  I love my simple man, I hope he has a wonderful year and the Lord blesses him, can't think that he will be anymore blessed than his last year, though a life time believer he accepted the Lord's salvation this last year... nothing will out do that.  He will have to settle for the knowledge of being a partaker in the Lord's salvation from here on out... I hope you partake as well this year, or better yet partake today.... tomorrow.

Saturday, April 13, 2013

Road trip for the Ladies and I.....

We have happily had two piglets for 4-H and were awaiting the weigh in and tagging on Sunday, right on Poppie's birthday.  Yesterday Poppie came in to tell me that one of the piglets had a anal prolapse. Okay, do the problems with piglets never end this spring?  I got right on craiglist knowing that a lot of the 4-H kids struggled to find piglets, none were available.  I found some in eastern Montana, far northern Montana and some heritage ones for exorbitant amounts.  I was beginning to think that the girls were not going to be able to continue in their pig projects.  I decided to look into the market pigs listing, I don't really know why, and low and behold there was one with piglets and at a good price.  I got on the phone and he was a very nice older gentlemen, not sure if his are quite old enough.  I told him that there had been such a drought of piglets that if they were close to ready they would be fine.  He said they were but had not been withered.  I told him that we really didn't have a problem with that as we can do it.  He quoted us a price of 40% less than his listing, which was truly kind.  Alas the Ladies and I are on a road trip this morning to go get them.  He buys food at the same place we do so not all that far a trip, win win.  Poppie is to sore to go so has declined to go and since it is his b-day weekend we didn't push him to go with us. 

We are up and ready to go get our two new piglets, we are hoping to get females but will get to pick when we get there.  He said he had 14 but some of them are runts so we will see how it goes.  I will keep this short and sweet as we are going soon.  Wish us luck, we have to start getting some pig luck soon.  Maybe, no, for sure, the Lord has a reason we just have to wait patiently to see the outcome.  The Lord's blessings hold you, wish us luck....tomorrow.

Friday, April 12, 2013

Goats in the yard, little toddlers in my bed..... time to start the day, oh my.

We are just finishing up the Bible reading and the singing practice.  The Ladies are working on their 4H project books, the front door opens and the 15 month old and the 4 year old are plunked into our bed.  Our Bubbles is not happy about mom leaving early but soon is cuddled into Poppies arms.  Cubbie is at the end of the bed all cuddled between the Ladies as they answer their questions.  Bubbles lays down to go to sleep and all is calm then Yogie looks out the window and all the goats are out in the yard.  She names all the ones she can see.  I asked her if she would go put them back in their pen.  She says "It is my project" and happily gets up to go put them up.  Imagine that, it bodes well for it being a good morning.  She is going out the door as Boy is coming in, so he goes along to help her get them in.  Boy and Yogie soon have them rounded up,  Boy guarded the gate as Yogie with a switch gets them into the pen.  Cleo didn't want to go in but Yogie won and soon they are all back in there pen.  Gets the blood pumping first thing, makes for a good day.  Bubbles is soon off to napping land.  She and Cubbie both get to go to Pre-School Group today, that will be nice as she usually doesn't get to go, but as she is getting older she is more able to participate. 

I joined a new group yesterday, so excited, it is a group of reusers, right up my alley.  I am excited, several years ago I looked into buying Tattler jar lids but though I read about them in Mother Earth and on line I never actually got any.  This group are working on purchasing a wholesale amount so by co-oping together we can all get them for a great price.  Tattler jar lids were invented in the 70's had a few years of popularity and then sort of faded away.  Some people continued to use them, but few, in the last few years there has been a resurgence of favor in the use of them.  They are a reusable jar lid.  The have a rubber gasket more like the rings of old.  The exciting part is that they are safely,  reusable.  the gasket is good for 20 or more times.  I was in a chat on this subject yesterday and was surprised to hear that some of the ladies had actually used metal flats more than once in their own home canning but never to use as gifts, I am not that brave.  I am excited to be in on actually getting the Tattlers as they are much safer and made to be used over and over.  Can't wait. 

More work on the kitchen to come, have to get some more boards to do the pantry.  Tucky gave me info that  Human Resources in Zootown is having a sale on slabs and boards, we will have to check it out.  We will need a slab for the mantle by the stove.  We have antique columns from an old mantle that we need to get set up and are planning on working on that so it will be a good opportunity to maybe get one.   It will be nice to get most of what we want to do done all at once, but then we will probably never actually be done, life goes one, needs change and change is inevitable.  I hope that today is the day that the Lord's message calls to your soul and today is the day of your salvation, to those already saved take glory in this day God gave it to us..... tomorrow.

Thursday, April 11, 2013

Poppie has an idea, a table and room change.....

I spent the day moving my front room around, well the morning anyway had the grands on my day off the later part of the afternoon.  I have to paint still so it will be a temporary fix and then back when the painting is done, I do like how I have it arrange.  We use the front room differently in the summer than the winter.  We don't us the stove all summer and the later part of spring, well here that has come, though we are going to have snow on Sunday.  Poppie never burns a stove in or after April so we make due.  I have had a sewing machine, well it was once a treadle machine, I had found it at the antique store in the 80's.  I was the only parlor machine I ever saw.  I loved it.  It looked like furniture and then it opened up into a sewing machine.  I needed money one year and my mom talked me out of it for cheap.  She took it home and found that it had some veneer work on part of it.  She was, and is a hardwood snob, so decided she would remake it.  She managed to take it apart and then lost interest.  She gave it back to me  but I never got it back together so it sat under the tree in my garden for 15 years.  The machine itself got ruined but the legs were lovely as ever.  They are actually brown rod iron.  Their configuration was different than another I have seen, I still love them, maybe because they were what was left of that special machine so long ago.  I digress.  Poppie had the center of the table we used to make the island left and it fit perfectly on my legs so now we have a repurposed little table in our front room.  I so want to put my tiffany lamp on it but the little grands would destroy it so the Ladies used it for a tiny dinner table last night, it is a lovely little piece, and wondrous because Poppie so gets it now. 

I am not sure that it was because of the repurposing we have been doing or it has been in the back of his mind for a while, because I have no extra room for canning, but either way Poppie had a magnificent idea.  My house was designed to be one of two ways.  As we bought the lot model and got a great deal on it because it had been there over two years, we got it the way it came and didn't get to make any of the choices for it.  It came with white walls and the lay out of the rooms the way it came.  Anyway the room that is the office off of my master suite was designed to either be an office or sitting room that attach to the master or it could have a different door way and be part of the kitchen.  It could have been a huge pantry.  Poppie has decided that we would benefit more from a pantry more than an office.  The built in we made on the sore thumb is the office now, that way the girls are in a public area on the computers, always thinking, they are getting older.  Anyway Poppie wants to close the door off to our room and put the door way from the kitchen and make it a pantry.  I can't wait for it to be done.  The storage and the upright freezer, maybe even the chest, can be in there, along with shelves, counter space and places for those machines you need but don't need on you counters all the time.  You know, the meat grinder, the grain grinder, the meat slicer, the apple slicer/corer,  all needed but so specialized that they are a storage nightmare when not in use,  now they will all have a place.  I have told you before nerd here, so though it is a dream come true for me, hardly worth mentioning to the non nerds.  I am so excited to have it.  I am glad he decided to do it before I paint the kitchen, front room and bathrooms, and now the new pantry, yay. 

I hope you have a great day and the love of the Lord shines in you life.  God is love..... tomorrow.

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Talent show, desk corner complete..... equals.

The Ladies and their friend Coppers combined into a trio in the talent show last night.  They did well but there was some problems with the mike and music which overshadowed their singing for part of the performance.  I think the most important part of a talent show at the grade school level is helping them build confidence in getting up in front of their peers and trying.   I think all the kids that participated did well and all built on their skills and confidence.  The program was fun, informal, no prizes given out as all who tried were winners.  It lasted about an hour and 15 minutes, it was a lot of fun and community building.  All that attended gained something, the best kind of event. 

The girls are practicing for singing at the nursing home and assisted living on Saturday.  The song they have chosen is making them work hard to try and get it right.  I can still not carry a tune but I think I have helped them get a grasp of how the melody goes.  They have decided to always try and sing a song that is familiar to the elderly they are singing to.  It always seem to be a comfort for them to hear something traditional.  I am glad that they are continuing in singing for them and am glad to see them feeling and understanding that joy of ministering.  It also helps them to have more comfort in being the focal point of an audience.  Win, win.

Poppie finished my desk and got it in place, it was made out of the old coffee table and matching end tables.  It came out very nice.  It fits in to the old snack bar part of my sore thumb island.  We just wanted  more definition between our kitchen and living areas so it is now transformed into a wall of sorts with one side facing the kitchen and the other a desk/bookcase hutch.  It really does look nice and reminiscent of craftsman built in.  Poppie did a wonderful job.  We still have to finish up the island but all is coming along, though Poppie is still stretched thin.  He and Mokie will be moving more things to storage today.  I bought paint for the kitchen yesterday.  I wanted a sage green or a terra cotta but in the end I went with a deep golden cream that accented the tiles.  I know in the end the cream will be less of a statement and probably a longer acceptable choice, less likely to be disliked with routine and age.  I rarely get tired of my choices but Poppie just might and he did let me paint my one wall in our bed room  paprika red, and it is very red, so it will be nice to be less controversial in the kitchen.  I am going to do undercoat and Kilz  before I paint,  the kitchen gets so much that can stain in it so thought I would cover anything under and hope to help with the future things that could cause paint problems.  I can't wait, this is the first time we have really tried to make our home ours.  It is great that the ours we are making it is a combined ours,  we would not have had the same combined ours even 5 years ago, we have so grown in the last few years, maybe more than in the prior 28, funny how that works. 

I get a lot of flack from my friends when I make the comments that you don't see a couple in a long term marriage, or I guess relationship, that don't have the same deep down values, ethic and beliefs.  They always say I am wrong or it is not that way all the time.   They will then say what about so and so she is so nice and he is a "xxxxx".  I always say either he is much nicer than we think or she is more like him than we suspect.  If you really pay attention you can soon see which is which.  God says you never yoke unequal's together, and if you watch unequal relationship never survive.  Birds of a feather always flock together.  It is great that in our relationship, Poppie and mine, that we are truly equals, and to those of you who look and say, they are nothing alike, you just aren't looking close enough, we are so much more alike than anyone would have imagined when we first started out or we wouldn't have succeeded in our long term relationship.  It was God's plan, all the long tern ones are gifts from God, never doubt it, he never yokes unequal's lastingly........ tomorrow.

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Bountiful Basket Hijinks......

I woke up being excited that it would be contribution day for Bountiful Baskets.  We had asked for an earlier time several weeks back, if that is something they could ever accommodate. We really had no hope of a change as we were the last site on the route, but one can hope and one can ask.  Much to our amazement we got word,  a total welcome surprise about a week or so ago that we would get a new time.  The only catch was that we would have to change weeks.  We were going to have to change from an A week to a B week.  We thought that was great we would end up having Bountiful Baskets two weeks in a row to make the change and tell everyone.  Well yesterday our delusions were put right.  Yes we are changing to a B week but the last A week did not happen.  You can not imagine the phone calls, emails and messages that Lady and I have had on this mix up.  I had placed a status in on our Bountiful Baskets Page of the change of weeks, but since we did not have a distribution day after getting the news of the change we could not update all of the people who contribute. I quickly updated all on the page but all do you have the page.  We were not prepared for there being no A week this week and our volunteers, and contributors are lost to what is happening, and are making calls to find out what is going on.  I love that so many are faithful to the Co-op and it's importance in getting good produce in our community.  The calls were a blessing in the end, but a lot of work.  It amazes me of how much good the coo-op has done in such a little bit of time.  Remember to order next Monday for our first B Week on April 20, yay Bountiful Baskets. Our volunteers and co-op participants rock!!

Pre-school this morning,  it will be interesting since we are still in the middle of building our island in the kitchen and the desk for the computer, which is right in the middle of the living room, so I hope she bears with our confusion.  I am loving the changes but poor Poppie is spread so thin, he and Mokie have been moving Bugs and Daughters stuff in to two different storage units.  Poppie has been feeding his friend animals every day for several weeks, so draining, and I have been trying to get Poppie to finish up my project, the ones I can't do.  I am so excited I have decide to tile a back splash and paint, but I can do that part.  Ironically several years ago I bought some hardwood to make chessmen but we never actually finished the project, the white hardwood is the exact size we needed to finish the desk and the black hardwood is just the ticket to lengthen the legs on the island.  The Lord is patient and gives us little messages if we only listen to his guidance.  I know some of you think I am belittling the Lord in thinking that he would care about my island or make allowance for it but I don't think the Lord ever considers his children's needs are beneath him.  He knew we would have a need when I bought the hardwood we just didn't know exactly when as he did.  The Lord does work in mysterious ways, loves us beyond reason, gives us gifts of his love and messages of his presence if we but listen..... tomorrow.

Monday, April 8, 2013

Pressure canners, the ups and downs of loving them.....

I spent 38 years afraid of using a pressure cooker or pressure canner.  I was 13 when I was making rhubarb, I know now not to make rhubarb in a pressure cooker but the things we do in our youth,  I blew one up.  I was new to using one and had watched my mom on many an occasion.  She was pregnant with my youngest biological sister and I was helping her cook.  I cut the rhubarb, pressure cooked it to the right temp, time and lbs, took it off the stove and ran water over it to cool it.  It was cool to the touch and I tried to take the lid off.  It wouldn't come off easily so I gave it a big tug.  I, and have always been, strong so I really reefed on it, big mistake,  the lid came off like a sledge hammer hit me in the forehead and dropped to the ground.  The heat, steam and burning hot rhubarb came right behind it. I don't know why but maybe it was instinct, I put my forearm across my eyes.  I am so blessed by the Lord that I did because it may have kept me from going blind.  I had major burns on my face and my forearm.  I still have scars on forearm, a mark where the petcock hit my forehead and a great respect for pressure cookers and canners.  I literally didn't not use anything that was a pressure cooker of any sort for 38 years.  I was terrified of them.  I spent years cooking ever thing water bath.  It wasn't a big problem, other than a waste of hours of time, for years and then the USDA started changing the rules and recipes for safe canning of vegetables.  I used antique and outdated canning books for years to can.  Finally a year ago I decide I was all grown up, seeing as I had turned 51 months before and decided to give pressure canning a go.  Well that, and the fact, that I just don't have the time to spend water bathing cabbage and green beans 3 and half hours when with a pressure canner would only take 90 minutes of cooking time.  I decide to go on quest for a pressure canner.

I am the queen of eBaying so I went to my internet and began to look for a likely subject to buy.  I found in a hurry the ones I might really like to have in my wildest dreams were well beyond the money I had to spend on purchasing one.  I would truly love to have the biggest All American they makes, can you imagine canning 19 quarts or 32 pints at once, oh the wonder.  I  digress into dreamland, forgive me.  Anyway beings as I couldn't not purchase my dream canner, I am really a nerd,  I decided to look into ones I might actually be able to afford.  I also decided with my fear I had to have one with the screw downs like an All American.  I soon found that the old nationals that became the All Americans had the screw downs.  I also found that I could get a vintage one or an antique one for much more reasonable.  I found a 80 year old one,  one thing I did remember from my Grandma Gladys was that if you take care of it a pressure canner is usable forever.  I decided to bid on it and won it.  I got it shipped to my house for less than a new gasket pressure canner, which I will not use.  I got it home and tried it out.  It's gauge works perfectly and it really looks like it spent half a century of more in someone's attic, it is beautiful and I like it's personality.  I did find that though it is a 15 quart model I only will can 5 regular quarts or 6 wide mouths as it is narrower than a modern one.  I soon loved my little pressure canner and wouldn't live with out it now.  I decided I would try getting another one,  I did pick up one that was just like mine but larger, in the end it  had a few problems as it too is 80 years old, but was not taken as good of care as my first one.  I have decide to only use it as a prep cooker for making stratus for mushroom growing, so it was win win.  A few weeks ago I decided to look again on Ebay for another one to go with the ones I have to make the canning a little faster. I came across one, no one was bidding one, I was really surprised because ones that looked worse than it were going for spendy money.  I decide to read the listing thoroughly.  I soon discovered that they listed it as unknown maker, which I am thinking scared buyers off.  So many people are so afraid of things that make no sense to me, really a pressure canner is a pressure canner all work the same way.  I think that the buyers were afraid of not knowing what it was so would not know how to get a manual for it.  I checked out the photos and looked on line at the models and photos of all the models.  I soon determined it was an All American from the 60's or 70's.  I bid and snapped it up for a steal.

I waited patiently and soon it came in the mail.  I was so excited.  It looks just like an older version of the new one that Lady bought last summer.  Same size and everything.  It will hold 7 quarts.  I put water in it and it works great.  I also decided that I would update this canner and I would have basically the same thing as a new one.  I went on line to the All American site and ordered a new gauge, a new petcock and weight/rattler, which this one did not have.  I got the pressure canner, new updated parts and still saved a hundred dollar on the same size canner.  Yay me.  The parts have now arrived and I can't wait to update the canner.  I really thought about leaving it original but decide in the end to just keep the parts so if I ever wanted it original that would be an option but I would have a state of the art canner to use with the new updates.  I love my original one and would never change it, I have to baby sit it more to watch the gauge but it is a beautiful antique.  My new one, well I guess new to me one, will allow me more freedom, instead of watching a gauge I will be able to listen to the rattle of the canner doing it's thing.  I love my canners and now do as much of my canning with my pressure canners and the old water bath is only pulled out if I really can't do it with the pressure canner.  I do sorrow for all those years of lost time from my own fear but now I have over come the paralyzing fear that held me in it's grasp and I will never go back.  It is funny that the over coming of one fear has opened up my life to over coming other fears and things that hold me back.  The Lord does work in mysterious ways and in his own time frame..... tomorrow.  

Sunday, April 7, 2013

Embrace the loves in your life......

I think in general at we all embrace our own loved ones.  We love our children, grandchildren and families.  Really have you ever meant a grandmother that didn't have the most wondrous grandchildren that ever were put on this earth.  Funny how to a one they think that their's is truly the most unique little creature that God ever created.  God intends us to love "ours" unconditionally, we never see that they can be brats, that some are truly little demons, or is it that our love and our over looking makes them into those undesirable creatures in the eyes of some one not their momma or grandmamma?  The end result it that we all love "ours", Gods wants it, and meant it to be that way, though he did tell us to train up our children, but I digress.  Embrace that love it is fleeting to have a child in your home, the sands of time take their youth in moments and you are left wondering when did that infant they laid in your arms turn in to a hulking 6'5" man?  When did my baby girl become someone else's momma?  Time stands still for no one. 

We love our friends, there are just some people in our lives that are dearer to us than our family,  we spend more time with them, we chose them in our lives. Our families are God's gift, and testing, our glory and our despair....  Friends should be our joy, we should take joy in having them.  They should never become our agony and when they do we should ask ourselves is this a relationship that God wants me to continue in? if not, unlike our families we can live without them in our lives.  Never forget that friends are for our good, and shouldn't be our destruction.

God should be our biggest love, we should embrace him and seek him like we do no other. We can not really love without know him, any kind of love that does not include him is less than it could be if he is a part of it.  I truly did not love my husband to the depth I do until I let the Lord guide that love.  My husband is so much more loving and caring with God guiding his soul.  I didn't know how to love unfettered until I let God be the first love in my life.  I think that that is one of God's mysteries, to truly love any one, or anything, we have to love through the window of God's love.  I don't know how to explain that to someone who does not love the Lord, it is part of faith I suppose.  It is like trying to explain the Bible to someone who does not believe.  They see is as a compilation of myths, really how could God; create the world is 7 days?  madness, it is called faith, the belief in things unseen.  I digress.  I do know that love unblanketed in God's love is so much less than it could be with God's love to magnify it. 

I was watching the news this morning and sadly they were talking about the fact that only one in seven people in American even read the Bible.  If 73 percent of American think of themselves as Christians, which is 7 our of 10, and only 1 in 7 actually read the Word that they profess to believe in, does that mean that they don't actually know enough about being a Christian and don't read the Bible but believe in what some one else told them was in the Bible? I truly wonder, and have no idea how some come to their profession of faith, and it is really none of my business, but I do hope that they are Christians in God's eyes, because in the end that is all the matters, that God's grace knows of your faith and holds you as his.... tomorrow.

Saturday, April 6, 2013

Demonstration day, and the island is going to be so beautiful....... maybe a ride later.

We got up and did our Bible first thing, the girls sang and then did one last quick run through of their demonstration.  We arrived on time, I hate to be late so am always a little early.  They got ready and drew their number, they were second in a group of 8.  They both did well no freezing up, but they both worried their fun loving spirits to a point that their personalities didn't really come out.  They did very well especially for a first time.  They got blue ribbons, which all but three kids who got purples received.  I was so proud of them.  They were very knowledgeable about their subject.  Two people said they would come buy pies this summer, and one of the judges wanted to know if they were going to be accountants when they grew up as they were already entrepreneurs.  One said she might, and she just might.  Nice way to start the morning.

We got home and shared our wonderful news with Poppie he had been working on our island.  He cut the riser legs, they are ugly but we should be able to make them truly a part of the piece by the time we are done.  We have left over pieces from the dresser that will really make the piece look wondrous when it is done.  I am glad we have all the piece of antique wood with the original patina on it.  I is nice that all the piece are so close in color.  We would have gotten further along on the island except that yesterday Poppie made me a barn wood bookcase and shelf for all of my cookbooks. I used two antique crates as bookcases for the girls cookbook collections, they were so proud that we got special display places all their own in our kitchen.  I am so glad that after 5 years of living in our house we are finally comfortable enough in it to make it "ours"  I love old barn would and now that we are incorporating it in to the house I feel for the first time it is really us.  Funny how at one time Poppie hated barn wood and now he so appreciates it.  He can see the beauty in it and grasp the concept of making the old new again.  I am loving my new house the more it becomes the house of our dreams, no one else's, as they probably wouldn't want it, but our dream house. 

We may sneak away later and go on a ride, but then again maybe not, as we have lots of stuff to move to storage and the island to work on so I am sure time will get away from us but one can dream.  I hope the Lord blesses your day, your life and you soul, he has wondrous rewards for us in heaven.  Life here is just a holding place for the glorious life to come, I hope you have secured your hereafter and accepted your invitation to live with and praise God in heaven, it's a free invitation, the grace of God is free to all takers.... tomorrow.  

Friday, April 5, 2013

Demonstration prep, friendships making, and don't thinks ever change, well maybe old ladies do.....sometimes.

My Ladies have been working on their demonstration for 4-H.  We had not really been on it like we should or maybe as we are really new to 4-H, with no background in it, we have no concept of how to do it in the first place so drug our feet.  Belle called my a while back and said her family would love to be guinea pigs for the girls if they needed an audience.  I think that is when it really dawned on me the day of giving the demonstration was soon at hand.  We had decided before she called on a subject and that the Ladies would do theirs together.  I know that it is felt that the demonstration should be a subject in conjunction with the project you are doing in 4-H but we couldn't actually think of one we felt comfortable with so in the end we went with something they are comfortable with.  They are doing their demonstration on their Farmer's Market business.  I had been having them type bio's on the computer,  they hone their typing skills, something they love to do as it is a new fun thing, and they get comfortable with thinking about the thoughts for their intros.  I didn't tell them they wouldn't be using them as I won't let them write down notes or cards to read from, because according to the 4-H rules on demonstration judging reading it can take points away.  Last night we in an impromptu format began their speaking parts of their demonstrations.  I think all the memory verses and singing done in front of the congregation, the nursing home and the assisted living have given them confidence in being in front of an audience.  Something they have received as a benefit and they didn't even know it.  They are getting a good grasp of what they want to say, in an easy format, they can actually say whatever they want and each time they practice it it is new.  They amazingly interject humor that a written card would not afford them.  Tonight we will finish up their posters and they should be ready for their demonstrations bright and early tomorrow.

I am the oldest of the oldest daughter of the oldest daughter that goes back numerous generations. I have had the unusually privilege of being the mother of two separate oldest daughters.  I have watched and seen the suffering of both as they try to grow and become.  The first time around I was much more a self absorbed person and maybe wasn't as supportive and helpful guiding my daughter through the pitfalls of making friendships.  I moved around so much as a child that I never quite learned how to make friendships.  Well that is not true I have really good friendships and have had several in my life time.  I am not good at making lots of friendships, there is a difference.  I am a needy possessive person so I attach to the friends I have and can be overbearing.  I get jealous of their other friendships and my feeling get hurt, well maybe those are attributes that I have overcome to some extent but it was a life time of work to be able to say that.  I have learned how to let go and let my friends be without getting my feelings hurt but it was not something I was taught I had to learn it the hard way.  I am my mothers daughter in that I think.  My mother has always had very few friends.  Once as a child I told her in a moment of meanness that I was not going to be like that as an adult, but alas as an adult I struggled with the same problem.  I have learned that I do love my friends and cherish them, I still don't have a lot of them but that ones I have are very special to me and they let me be me and love me because I am me.  I don't have to change to have them, and don't have to caterer to them for them to love me.  They are real and accept me for the real me.  I digress.  My oldest daughter struggled as a child to make good friendships, she so wanted one and in the end she became a door mat to the people who "allowed" her to be their friend.  I was not able to help her have self worth and teacher her her value.  I failed my child and I will forever regret my failure. 

I, by the grace of God, was given a second family, my two Ladies.  I am now a more together person but in so many ways things don't change.  The same worldly temptations, me first, squabbling world of grade school still exists. I am not better at learning how to teach what I didn't get from all the moving.  I have two lovely Ladies that are being raise at best out of step with modern times.  I am old in my ways and my faith doesn't allow for me to change to being more accepting of the pitfalls of todays society.  I never allow my child to wonder the streets, well if I could stop it,   I made many mistakes wit the older ones and spent a time in a clinical depression that allowed me to step out of my life so my children lost at that time.  I will never go back to that and my Ladies are the better for it, as our my grands.  I am in their lives and help them navigate it but alas I still don't want them wandering about downtown.  They don't get to do a lot of the thing the kids their age get to do.  Yogie is a lot like Goofy, mom and I.  She so wants that special friendship but is not quite sure how to get one.  She is sad a lot because she gets picked on. I try to help her have self worth, and I think she has it but sometimes she gets angry and puts people off or maybe just grates.  I am not saddened by her ability to stand up for herself in ways Goofy couldn't or didn't know how to.  Yogie is more like I was, so is consider a little odd by some of her classmates, but does stand up for herself when she needs to.  She is also a little mouthy, hmmm wonder where she gets that?  I guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree even if it is a grafted apple.....  I don't know how to fix it and maybe the key is that I should fix it, I should just be there to be her support and bolster the successes she makes..... tomorrow.