Wednesday, May 28, 2014

I am a work in progress and the Lords continues to work on me daily.....

One of the things that I hope comes across as I write to you is that I never preplan my blogs.  Okay, to hard core bloggers I know that is a big mistake but I am not a hard core blogger and my intent is not to sell you something, physically or emotionally, my intent is to be honest to myself and let you in for the ride.  I actually rarely see you as my audience, my real audience is me, I am writing this blog as a diary and most of you have long ago figured that out.  The you I most often talk to is, me, past, present or future, and I let you all  see me doing it good or bad.  I have said before none of my kids read my blog, well maybe one here and there but none of them are interested, now, in my thoughts or words, they think they have heard it before, well maybe they have but most likely not so much.  I have said I write for them, and that is true, but not necessarily the them of now, but the me of now, and the them of the future when they may actually have some interest in who I really was, maybe only once I have gone home.  I am the me of now daily, yesterday is past and today I am a new me of now so my blog grows, changes and develops as does the inner me.  If you read a blog a year ago about an opinion I had on a subject it may or may not be the same today.  I am just trying to be as honest as I can be to me with the current information I have and how I think can change with new input. I am a work in progress and God is trying to mold me daily.  Some days he succeeds in making me a better person and some days he shakes his heads and wonders if I will ever really get it.  I do want to make one side note, I try to end every blog with a plea for all who hear the call of God to listen and respond, I know that my duty as a Christian is to take the Word of God to the lost, I will never change that aspect as that is probably the most important thing that I could do as a blogger is to take the Word of God to even just one lost soul so that they could seek God and find their salvation.  I can save no one, I can only share Gods precious word so he can save all of his lost children.

I once believed, and have even written in my blogging, that I believed that a person could loose their salvation and I now know that that is just not true. I was confused with what Grace truly was.  Salvation is not of me on any level, and that no one deserves, it so if God gives it to you he is faithful and would never take back his gift.  I was confused in thinking that a person had to be a person of works to keep salvation which is just not true.  God's salvation is a gift, period, and if a person fails, falls short, changes their mind or walks completely away, it does not effect God he is always the same and never changing so salvation once giving is a gift for eternity.  We are the failures, and the weak, not God.

I have struggled with relationships in my life and have discussed them on many a page and have come to the determination that people are doing the best they can, Sometimes their mistakes have caused pain and devastation in my life but I can not change the past, and can probably never understand the intent or even if there was an intent for maybe I was just collateral damage and the person never intended me the pain they caused.  I need to forgive and forget.  I have said before that I can forgive because the Lord asks me to, if some one asks it of me, but I can't always forget but I have come to learn that that is something that I have to do.  The forgetting is the true forgiveness and the hanging on of the pain is devastating so I need to forgive, and forget, for my soul as much as for the one who caused me pain. God forgives and forgets and I have his example to follow and am on my path to true discipleship only when I can follow his example.  I have heard those who control your anger control you, well the reality is those who control any of your emotions, thoughts or pains controls you, so don't let them; forgive, forget and get on with the freedom of knowing only God controls any and all of your being.

I know I am a work in progress and in many ways a mellower, milder more loving version of who I once was but God has a lot more work to do on me, so I am growing daily and for now I am content with that and with who I am today, I am not sure, well I know for sure I am still a broken fleshly human that has a long long way to go but I am a little farther along than I was even a year ago,  a week ago or a day ago. God is making me more like his son daily, and I stand in wonder at the work he has already accomplished..... I pray that you are saved, if not, email me and we can talk, or pick up a Bible and seek him in earnest and he will speak to you. I pray for your day, your life and you eternity....tomorrow.  

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