Saturday, May 14, 2011

Prayer in my life is probably not traditional but it has always been a comfort to my soul.

I can remember the prayer my dad said at every meal from as small as I can remember. My dad always said it and then we ate, it was almost always the same, some would say it was by rout but I believe that my dad said with God in his heart every time he just didn't feel the need to change it up. I have heard all sorts of prayers of grace and they are almost always the same, praying for what we eat may not be a very creative endeavor. I believe that just the doing of it says something about who you are as a family. I tried to make sure that grace was said at the table when our older kids were little but I didn't always stay consistent. My little girls share the duty of grace and we try to always include prayers for those in need, and to pray for those less fortunate than ourselves, I try to give them a form of self expression in their praying so they have a true comfort with speaking to the Lord. I hope that doesn't offend but I want them to be able to conversate with the Lord.

Praying has always been in my life but I am not sure I do it like you are supposed to do it. Yes, some times I pray to God through Jesus in a very formal way in Church and on many occasions but that is not the way I usually pray. Praying for me is more like an on going conversation with the Lord. I find my self talking to God a great deal but it is almost always out loud when I am doing something. I may be doing the dishes, carving, walking or pulling weeds. My husband and kids think I am talking to myself. Yogie ask me once,"why do you talk to yourself" I told her sometimes I talk to the Lord, and sometimes I talk to myself, I told her it was ok to talk to yourself, sometime you need to know what you think and talk it over with yourself to get thinks all straight between you and your self.  She talks to herself and she is comforted by the conversations. When she was little she of all my children had what I would call an imaginary friend she spoke with.   I think that maybe it was that she needed to talk to herself and I gave her permission to do so and it helps her along the way.

Back to praying. I know the Lord speaks to me, no, I have never had the pleasure of hearing his voice, I know others do, but the Lord doesn't speak to me in a voice that I can hear. The Lord speaks to me in many ways though. Sometimes when I am low and don't know what I should do to get our family afloat, as we live on a fixed income through Poppie and anything extra comes from my carvings, or any of the many ways I find to make money. I sometimes find that money is short and I don't know where we will find it to keep going and pray to the Lord, I am not the kind of person that only prays at the last moment but I am guilty of not always praying as the first course either. I pray mostly in the middle of a situation and am trying to work on having the conversation with God first. I most often get the answer almost immediately from God, I will be distressed that maybe Ebay or Etsy is not where I should be working and maybe I should find another way to work, and from out of know where my sales will jump up the next morning or I will get a special order that surprises me, or antlers that I needed come my way, either as a gift, someone has ones they don't need or an order I had given up on, thinking the seller had stolen my money months ago, arrives on my door step. All assurances from God that I am where I need to be, at home with my kids, Poppie and the goats.

My dad always taught us that the Lord will provide, when you truly need something from God, it always comes to you, he is our father and he provides us with what we need, not always what we want but what we need, a great difference. I know that I may fall short on many levels by people that judge me but I do know that I am where I should be in this life, at this time, the Lord God tells me so in so many ways...... tomorrow.

1 comment:

  1. I think the way you pray is very traditional. It sounds to me like "prayer without ceasing". I don't know how others do it, but I have a constant dialogue with God, just as you have described. Sometimes if I am out in public, or in my car, I put my cell phone to my ear so people won't have a clue. Silly, huh? But God still hears! My family is thankful that you pray for us. I believe it is part of the reason we are still making it!
    Thanks for this post.
    Lawana (who would love someone's advice about how to keep me from displaying as "welcome" :)


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